Wilderness

It started last summer and has continued on in spite of my best efforts to thwart His better plan.

God really wants us to know Him. Like, really know Him. He has blessed me with several very good friends and it is a wonderful thing indeed to be known; I can understand, a little bit, the pleasure He must derive from us knowing Him more and more. I love getting to know God more, it's the best thing in the world. But I've been so blessed with amazing friends and family, I haven't had to depend wholly and completely on Yahweh for all of my needs; not just the physical and spiritual, but the emotional and relational needs too. Don't get me wrong, I am exceedingly grateful for every relationship God has blessed me with - I think a foundation of love and trust of and from the people around me is a very good thing. But sometimes God wants to remind us of what the best thing is - Him. On Sunday my pastor was talking about wilderness times in our life. Usually, when someone is going through a hard time, people want to help them out, comfort them, show them they care. And sometimes, that's exactly what that persons needs. But sometimes, the wilderness we're going through is God breaking us till we come to the end of ourselves and rely fully on Him, not our own strengths or skills, not our friends who love us but are just human.

Starting near the beginning of last summer, it seems like God has been continually putting me in situations where I feel alone, separating me from my close friends (whether with geographical distance or time), and forcing me to rely on Him only. I have felt like a bit of a loner at times before this, but, though I spend more time with some people than I did before and I'm getting to know some people pretty well, I feel like a lone wolf a majority of the time. I feel as if I don't belong here - in a good way. I can function and even thrive in many different kinds of groups and settings with many different people. I am more comfortable with myself now than I have ever been before. But the only sense of "belonging" I get is when I'm spending time with God. Yeah, people are cool and I love them a lot. But right now, people just aren't doing it for me; I don't need them to. God is where it's at. I am His Beloved and that's enough for me.

At the same time, my Lord is showing me how He provides everything. I sometimes don't want to invest in other people because I know how much I want to love each one and it seems overwhelming to try and love that many people that much. But the more I poor out love for others, the more God fills me up. And so, He even provides the love I need to serve His people.

I am the daughter of Yahweh, His precious and valued child. He provides for my every need and satisfies every desire of my heart. He knows me and loves me and is molding me into who He wants me to be (while teaching me how to be more pliable). He is my Rock and my Salvation, whom shall I fear?

"But I trust in your unfailing love;

my heart rejoices in your salvation. 

I will sing the LORD's praise, 

for he has been good to me."

Psalm 13:5-6

Packing Dilemma

Two reasons for this post:
#1-I figured I should have at least one 2013 post.
#2-I didn't feel like posting two FB statuses about the same event within 5 min of each other.

                So, college is weird. It's like you're on your own, but just kidding, not really. This presents many unique challenges, but the one presenting itself tonight (the day before Thanksgiving Break) is clothes. I can never remember what clothes I left at home or if I brought most of my clothes to school. I spend most of my time now with my base in Kentucky instead of at home, so one would think I brought most of my clothes with me. But, this semester is unique in that I'm actually off campus like half the time and wearing pretty much the same clothes because of the activities I'm partaking in. So I know I tried to bring less clothes because I knew I wouldn't use them all. I still brought too many/have too many in general. Because I have too many clothes, I periodically go through them and get rid of as many as I can. Well, that's not totally true. I could get rid of all of them except for one or two sets. Hmm. Anyways, I generally go through and get rid of clothes as I'm packing for college at the beginning of each semester/school year. So I can never remember what clothes are still at home. This makes it difficult to pack for say, a week-long break because I want to pack light (haha, good one), but I want to be prepared for anything I might do over break. Being at college and being me (3rd child of 6 that I am), I rarely have a great idea of what my family's schedule is over breaks. So I end up packing for every day plus lots of running clothes (just in case) and realizing that I didn't really need that much. But then, sometimes I wish I'd brought types of clothes I didn't. But it's different every time. And I almost always pack the night before (or the hour before) leaving...Hmm, 2013 Thanksgiving break challenge: pack entirely in one backpack. Hehe. If I succeed, my parents will be shocked.

College

    Well, I've done it. I've made one of the "big decisions". First off, I've decided to go to college. And, amazingly enough, I've finally decided where I'm going to go (with lots of help from my parents of course)! This fall I will be attending Asbury University in Wilmore, KY. Wilmore is a little town in the middle of Kentucky about 20 minutes southwest of Lexington. The area is beautiful and so green! The main reason I chose Asbury was because of their horse program. The major I'm looking at is actually a double major called Equine Facilitated Wellness. The 2 majors are Equine Management(now Equine Studies) and Psychology. I got to sit in on a class while my mother and I were visiting and I could easily see myself learning right along with the other students(mostly girls) in the horse program. The equine facilities are nice with 2 barns, an indoor riding arena, and around 300 acres of land with several trails. A unique aspect of the horse program is their Police Horse Training Program in which some of the students get assigned a 2 yr-old colt (a young male horse) to train for several years. I thought that sounded pretty great.=) And that is in addition to all the other things I'll be learning. Anyways, I really liked what I saw, especially the hands-on approach they use which works well for me.
    Asbury is a Christian university, so I'll be learning from a Christian perspective without leaving out non-Christian theories and such. The school is small so the professors get to know their students a little better than at a larger school and the ones I met were very willing to help their students (and us). Also, the dorms are segregated and I'll be required to live on-campus all 4 years, so I'll get to know the girls in my hall/dorm really well.=)
    And now I'm distracted and am done talking about it.=P So anyways, now I feel old and grown up (kind of) and it's weird, but ok.=) And I'm also kinda sad because A Tale of Two Cities will be my last Fine Linen Drama production for awhile at least.='( And I'll be leaving lots of people behind of course.=\ But then, I'll get to meet lots of new people in KY and I'll be learning lots of new things. So I think it'll be worth it.=) Well, that's where I am with life right now. I wonder if anyone actually reads my blog? Hmm, oh well. It's a good place to vent my detailed-ness.=)

Oh, and you may have noticed, I'm not even going to bother apologizing for not blogging in forever. Let's just say it's a given that there will be a very large time gap between every post. Otherwise I'd have to start every post with an apology. That would be annoying. And if I happen to actually start keeping up with my blog, that'll just be an extra special treat. Or maybe extra torture...hmm...

College

Those of you who know me pretty well probably know that I'm not a very good decision maker. It often takes me a long time to decide anything, from what I want to eat a restaurant, to what I wear every day. And most recently, where do I want to go to college and what do I want to major in? The important decisions are the worst, because I really care about whether I make the right decision or not. So that's where I am now, trying to figure out what the best direction to send myself would be and trying to make wise decisions lining up with God's plans and not just my own. Fortunately, I'm not a very good planner-type person, so as long as I can figure out what God's plan is for me, I should be good.=) Sometimes, I wish that my parents would just make all the decisions for me and I would just go wherever they tell me to and I wouldn't have to make decisions. But then I figure that I should learn how to make important decisions on my own (no matter how much I don't like it), because they're going to keep coming at me and I won't always have someone there to decide for me.=) And it would be really silly if I couldn't make decisions on my own. But as long as someone is here to help me make important decisions, I will definitely take advantage of that! But I really wish there were just fewer options. And that I had a more focused interest maybe? I'll figure it out eventually. Hopefully before I go somewhere...

Oh yeah, so FYI, the Atkins diet didn't really work out.=) It's ok though. Now I'm on the "I'll try to take smaller portions" diet. Right. Umm, so I'm a really horrible blogger (as I'm sure y'all know already), so I'm kinda sorta ending this blog. I might maybe post some stuff in the future, but don't count on it.=) I do have fb though, so if you're just dying to know what's up with my life, you can look me up there.=) OK, bye now.

Atkins

Hey people.=) Sorry for not keeping up with my blog at all.....=\

So Becky, Mom, and I decided to do the Atkins diet. I think it's good that we're all doing it together. I know a lot of people say Atkins is bad or dangerous, but my mom has done it before and it's really helped her. If you do what they tell you to do and everything it's all good.=) Anyways, we started yesterday so we'll see how this goes.=) The first 2 weeks are called Induction and we're only allowed to eat 20 net carbs a day, so if I happen to be eating with you and my plate isn't completely filled like it usually is, that's the reason.=) So don't freak out or anything.;) Oh yeah, I'm not doing this diet because I think I'm fat or because I'm trying to lose a ton of weight or anything. Yeah, I'll probably lose weight, but it'll be the weight that I don't need. I know I'm not fat, but I definitely have fat that I don't need, and I'd just like to get into a healthier eating style. After the first 2 weeks or so we'll start adding fruit and stuff back in and we'll be allowed to have more carbs. The first day went well and I'm looking forward to having more energy. I also started running again a few weeks ago and was doing really good with running every day I was supposed to with the schedule I have, then it started raining, and Mom and Dad were gone for the weekend so I slept in and basically, I was lazy and didn't run for a few days.=( But I ran this morning with my daddy on the trails and had a good time, so I think that was enough to motivate me to keep at it.=) I love running.=D TTFN!

~Abby

Seussical the Musical!

Hey guys! Wow. It's been a really really long time.....It would take way too long to completely update y'all ;) on everything that's gone on since my last post, but I can tell you what I'm up to right now.=) For me (and Zeke and Mom), this is show season. And this spring's show is Seussical the Musical! It's an awesome show and I hope most of you have been able to make it or buy tickets for this weekend. I'm pretty sure there are only a few tickets left. Big surprise going into the second week and all.=) Anyways, I am having a ton of fun being in the show and hanging out with all the people involved.=) The first weekend was a big success, with a full house for every show. We'll probably sell out the second weekend too.=) After Seussical's over =( I suppose I'll finish up all that school I've been putting off and help Dad coach Zeke's soccer team and do a million other things that I've involved myself in.....*sigh*. Sometimes, I wish I wasn't involved in anything and just stayed home all the time reading or riding. But what fun would there be in that? Honestly, that would get very boring pretty quickly. Sure it'd be nice for awhile not to have anything I had to do or places I had to go, but I would definitely miss people. I would find a way to get involved again, just as much as I am now.=) I've pretty much come to grips with that. And then I think again and marvel at those people who are even more involved than I am. Just Think! Ok, my mind is going....I need to sleep. (As my mother so sweetly reminds me.) Goodnight.

It's a Ball!

The Jovial Beggars are hosting an Autumn Ball on October 30th! I'm really excited.=) It's in Salem in the City Hall(I hear the hall has a really nice wood floor and a balcony above the dance floor where you can watch) The ball starts at 6:30 p.m. and the cost is $7. There are also workshops beforehand that cover piano, other musical instruments, calling, and dancing(imagine that)! Some of the workshops cost a little as well, but I know the dance workshop is free. I know it's going to be super fun, and you all should definitely come if you can!=) It is a ball, so you should wear something a bit fancier, even period dress if you have it. I'll be wearing a dress I made last year from the French Revolution era(or whatever). ;) I can't wait to see all of you!=D

~Abby

Soccer

I think most of you know that Zeke plays soccer right? Anyways, Dad's the coach, Zeke's on the team, and I go to the practices and games when I can.=) The team is really good this year apparently, because we are undefeated!!=D Isn't that exciting? We have a lot of good players, but they actually work together most of the time. It's pretty awesome. I just wish I wasn't too old to be on the team.=(

Jorge

Becky has a fish. His name is Jorge (I was wrong, but I corrected it). He's supposedly hard to kill. Becky left him here this week. I guess we shall see if this theory holds true or not.;}

Testing

I'm testing something I just discovered about Word. Apparently you can blog directly from Word. I guess we'll know if it worked or not!=)

Sweet 16, Finally!

My birthday is Thursday!=) I'm really excited. Mainly because that means I can get my license Friday.=)

(This is for Mrs. Q)
I love driving. There's something about being in control of something so powerful and going so fast(comparatively) but still being under control. It's kind of like riding a horse, but you're never afraid of falling off, just going off the road maybe. If you think about it though, that's not as scary. There's just something about falling that seems to be scarier than almost anything else. Another thing I love about driving is the opportunity it provides to go much longer distances to visit friends and family. Friendships can become much stronger when you get to see your friend multiple times a week instead of maybe twice a month. Plus we can live farther apart, so if we wanted to, we wouldn't have to see each other very often. (Getting a bit off subject, sorry...) Anyways, driving is pretty much awesome for a bunch of different reasons.=)

Abby

Horse Stuff

Hello.

Romeo had this weird thing going with his mane, so I decided to look it up. Basically, there's this one spot on his mane that looks like really bad dandruff and has lost a little bit of hair. Fortunately, it's not a very big spot. Anyways, I looked it up and I think it's either dandruff or something else that I can't remember the name for. Either way, both happen because of lack of care! Well, at least lack of grooming and stuff. Apparently I need to brush/wash his mane more often...=\ Maybe it's not dandruff. Maybe it's some super rare disease that no one's ever heard of and I'll get to name it something super random and weird(I wouldn't name it after myself, that'd just be boring.)! Of course, I should probably just wash both of the horses manes and tails regularly and brush them whenever I ride and see if it goes away.....

Oh. We don't have Bourbon anymore. We decided not to buy him, and I think his actual owners may have found someone else to buy him. I'm not sure how I actually feel about this. We parted on good terms though. In some ways, it's really nice just to have 2 horses(and those 2 be the R team), but then of course only 2 people can ride at a time. And Bourbon was really smooth. But he was stubborn and old... oh well. Just thought you should know. Not sure why.....

Goodbye.

Painting Pictures

Before we painted it was all just white. So, I figured it wouldn't be that hard to picture, so I didn't take any pictures of that. I just took pictures before and after we moved the furniture. Let me know if you like it!=)

Painting!

So, with all this extra time that I have now I've decided to fill it as quickly as possible!=) I recently got a couple babysitting jobs and will start my other one soon. And since Isaac was going to be gone(he'll be home Friday) Mom suggested that now would be a good time to paint the kids' room(I&E share). So for the last 3 days(in between babysitting jobs) Mom and I(and Zeke and Andy too) have been painting away!=) I've been wanting to paint that room for awhile because I knew it'd be fun and it was very boring and white.

Mom let me decide what all the walls would look like(what colors and such) and I think that'll be pretty apparent when you see pictures.=) The wall with the door and closet we painted blue. the other 3 walls we painted white to be added to later. Then on the wall with the window, Andy painted a thick green stripe and thinner white and blue stripes at the top of the wall(like a border). The other 2 walls were adjoining, and on those(this took the longest, the other stuff we got done the first day) Mom and I painted diagonal stripes!=) The green stripes are the biggest, the blue stripes are a little smaller, and the white stripes are a little smaller than the blue. Every other stripe is white, and the other every other alternates between green and blue. It looks really cool(if I do say so myself). Oh yeah! We painted the door frame, closet door frame, and window frame green.=)

Isaac dosen't know about it and neither does Becky. Becky's coming home tonight, I'm excited!=) I have to go take the tape off now. I will get pictures of before and after we put the furniture back. TTFN!

So this is what life is like!

Well Annie is over now and it was a lot of fun.=) Of course, I couldn't really do much besides Annie for almost a month, but it was fun.=) It's so strange now, being able to do things. Like I get to ride my horses almost every day now.=) And all other sorts of other possibilities open up as well.

Have I mentioned that Zeke was playing baseball this summer? It's over now. They had a good last game though! Zeke pitched well(he's one of their main pitchers), and there were some really good plays. They played the 1st place team(they were 3rd or something) but were ahead most of the game. The last inning we kinda fell apart, but, on the whole, I'd say it was a good game. Plus, friends came to watch, which always makes everything more fun!=)

Annie

Annie performances are coming up! For those of you who didn't know, I'm in OAT's summer production of Annie. I'm lots of different people, mainly Cecille the maid. It's been fun for the most part, though it is harder to memorize all the songs and the choreography in such a short time space, but it's good for me.=) Anyways, you should totally come and see at least one of the performances! Performance dates and times are as follows:

Thursday, July 8 - 7:00 pm

Friday, July 9 - 2:00 pm matinee & 8:00 pm

Saturday, July 10 - 2:00 pm matinee & 8:00 pm

Sunday, July 11 - 2:00 pm matinee

Thursday, July 15 - 7:00 pm

Friday, July 16 - 2:00 pm matinee & 8:00 pm

Saturday, July 17 - 8:00 pm

Sunday, July 18 - 2:00 pm matinee

Hope you can make it!

Well all 3 horses are getting along fine for the most part. There is a tiny bit of competition between the guys for the girl(of course), but nothing really bad. Kels & I went bareback riding sometime around 2 this afternoon. She rode Romeo and I rode Rylee first then Bourbon. Rylee is not very comfortable. It's not bad when you're just walking, but trotting kinda hurts.=) Bourbon is much more comfortable, but much more likely to try something(like bucking or just running off, or something like that). Romeo was great according to Kelsey. He didn't freak out or anything when Rylee was left behind and Rylee was fine while we were riding but did freak out a little when we left her alone in the pasture. Nothing bad, just running around and calling after the boys. Bourbon freaked out a little less than Rylee when he was alone in the pasture, but he also was calling back when I was riding him. We all survived though and it was a lot of fun.=) I haven't ridden bareback very much though, so I didn't want to canter yet. Maybe next time...=)

This evening, Becky and I rode(with saddles) a bit then went back for Romeo so Dad could join us. Becky is happy ridding Bourbon, though after Dad joined us and we rode w/ me on Romeo, Dad on Rylee(he hadn't ridden her yet) and Becky on B. we switched it up and Becky rode Rylee, Dad rode Romeo, & I rode Bourbon. She(Becky) did fine on Ry, though I think she got pretty bounced around when we cantered.=) Bourbon is actually really smooth, trotting and cantering(when he gets going). I can't imagine what his gallop would be like...of course, I probably wouldn't be able to get him to gallop, he's kinda old-ish.Oh well...I would like to gallop on Romeo though, I bet that guy's got some speed. Anyways, I guess I've been rambling on quite enough.=) I should go now. Oh, I think Mom took a picture of Rylee right before Kels and I rode.....yup! Here it is.=)

Ok, here's a few pictures of the horses. I will try to take more sometime so you can see Rylee too.

This is Romeo. He's "Dad's horse."

He's really pretty in real life.

 Romeo and Bourbon(This is before the girl came).

 Pretending to be best friends.